Past masters: Damon RunyonPosted: March 2, 2012
One cold winter evening I am sitting in my easy chair reading a book, which is a very healthy pastime and a great character builder from all I hear. I wish to say I enjoy this book more than somewhat, as it is written by no one but a scribe known as Damon Runyon. At first Damon Runyon is known by all and everyone as a scribe in the newspaper dodge, and soon he begins to write stories about the guys and dolls such as are around and about Broadway.
I am surprised no little that more citizens are not aware of the stories by the scribe Damon Runyon, as the guys and dolls such as are around and about Broadway are always of interest. A very popular television program in recent times tells the story of a family named Soprano, who reside in New Jersey and are known as coming guys in the waste management dodge. This is not a family which I will choose if I am doing the choosing, as I am a law-abiding citizen at all times, and am greatly opposed to citizens who violate the law. But before long it is clear that even citizens who violate the law have plenty of ticker and take care of their loved ones in their hearth and home in first-class style, at that.
And I wish to say that the guys and dolls in the stories by the scribe Damon Runyon also have plenty of ticker, and yet are ones of whom you would like to retain their friendship. You cannot help only to like these guys and dolls if you are an ordinary human being, such as has always liked hearing about such matters as influential citizens and wet merchandise.
Damon Runyon is such a scribe as can describe guys and dolls in ways you are not forgetting same. He writes as follows, and to wit:
“If I have all the tears that are shed on Broadway by guys in love, I will have enough salt water to start an opposition ocean to the Atlantic and Pacific, with enough left over to run the Great Salt Lake out of business. But I wish to say I never shed any of these tears personally, because I am never in love, and furthermore, barring a bad break, I never expect to be in love, for the way I look at it, love is strictly the old phedinkus.”
“I can see the old love light shining so brightly in their eyes that I get to thinking that maybe money does not mean so much alongside of love, at that, although personally, I will take a chance on the money.”
“When a guy is knocking around Broadway he is bound to accumulate dolls here and there, but most guys accumulate one at a time, and when this one runs out on him, as Broadway dolls will do, he accumulates another, and so on, and so on, until he is too old to care about such matters as dolls, which is when he is maybe a hundred and four years old, although I hear of several guys who beat even this record.”
As should not be a surprise to anyone many motion pictures and plays are made from stories by the scribe Damon Runyon, including a well-known musical extravaganza known as “Guys And Dolls,” but I wish to say I do not care for any part of well-known musical extravaganzas, as I believe them to be the phonus bolonus. Although it is known far and wide that the motion picture of “Guys And Dolls” features a guy by the moniker of Brando, and another guy by the moniker of Sinatra, who are regarded as a couple of right gees at that.
So I suggest and recommend that you find and read the stories by the scribe Damon Runyon, as they are high-grade merchandise indeed, if you are such a citizen as will enjoy a good story. And I wish to say that if you do not enjoy them, then you must be such a citizen as will never enjoy much of anything in this world.