“Down through the village with a broomstick in his hand / Running here and there, all around the square, shouting ‘Catch me if you can.'”
Okay, a magical snowman does that, and he’s a beloved holiday story.
But when I do it, I’m a public nuisance.
I’ve been told by those who know these things that tonight, the night before Thanksgiving, is the busiest night of the year for bars, taverns, and nightclubs. If you’re hitting the town tonight please be mindful of this and be extra kind to your greeter, bartender, server, and bus help.
And as always – tomorrow, if you need to purchase anything – gas for the car, a coffee, some ingredient that was overlooked – please thank the person who serves you. We’re able to enjoy our holiday because they are working on theirs. It doesn’t have to be over the top; just say something like, “Thanks for working today. It’s making my day easier.”
Just my .02. Word to the herd.
Today is opening day for the 152nd Minnesota State Fair. The Great Minnesota Get-Together, the largest state fair in the US by average daily attendance, and second only to Texas in total attendance. It’s a late-summer tradition for hundreds of thousands of Minnesotans, who come out to celebrate all that our great state has to offer. The State Fair balances traditional hallmarks and modern expectations, and creates summertime memories for rural families and urban dwellers alike.
And you know what that means, don’t you?
KOOL 108 has started playing Christmas music.
There’s a warm feeling in the air that no other holiday season can match. Family and friends are beginning to gather together to share warm feelings of affection and celebration. Small children wait in breathless anticipation for Santa’s visit, and the happiness and excitement it will bring.
And you know what that means, don’t you?
The radio stations have begun their Valentines Day promotion.
A couple was in a busy shopping center just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing. And since they had a lot to do and very little time to do it in, she called him on her cellphone.
The husband answered. “Hello, dear.”
“Where are you?” she asked. “You know we have lots to do.”
“Darling,” he said, “do you remember the jewelers shop we went into about ten years ago? Where you fell in love with that diamond necklace?”
She gasped. “Why… yes… I do.”
He continued. “I could not afford it at the time, but I said that one day I would get it for you? Do you remember that shop?”
Little tears started to flow down her cheek, and she got all choked up. “Yes, I do remember that shop,” she gasped.
“Well,” he said, “I’m in the bar right next to it.”
is the design an international food chain put on its holiday cups –
– you need to drop to your knees each morning and give thanks to Jesus for allowing you a life that is so blessed and carefree that you have the luxury of –
– getting your (holiday-themed) panties in a wad about the design an international food chain put on its holiday cups.
That is all.
Kind of a holiday tradition.
The directions on the box say: “Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, or until a fork inserted in center comes out clean.” So I inserted a fork in the center.
It came out so clean that I inserted all the dirty forks from the sink, and they all came out clean too.
At a Christmas Eve service, the preacher was telling his congregation that the entirety of the human experience could be found in the Bible. Anything they could think of, old or new, he said, was discussed somewhere in the Bible, and every aspect of our daily lives will be addressed there.
After the service, he was approached by a middle-aged husband who said, “Preacher, I don’t believe the Bible mentions PMS.”
The preacher smiled, opened his Bible, and began to read: ” . . . and Mary rode Joseph’s ass all the way to Bethlehem.”
No, you don’t.
Can you imagine if every single day, week after week, year after year, was Christmas?! Shopping to give people presents every day? Decorating your home and preparing Christmas dinner every day? Arranging time off of work and traveling to visit friends and family? Virtually every business and office closed? Plus all of your favorite TV shows postponed, and nothing but Christmas songs on the radio… forever?!
And what about poor Santa? Having to make that trip every single night of the year?
More importantly, you’d soon get sick of it being Christmas. Holiday fatigue would set in; too much of a good thing. It would become just another dopey, predictable, routine drudge. “Oh, man, Christmas again already. I’m barely recovered from yesterday’s Christmas…”
“After a while turkeys got to be awfully scarce, selling for about a thousand dollars apiece. They got to passing off almost anything for turkeys–even half-grown hummingbirds. And cranberries–well, they asked a diamond apiece for cranberries. All the woods and orchards were cut down for Christmas trees. After a while they had to make Christmas trees out of rags. But there were plenty of rags, because people got so poor, buying presents for one another, that they couldn’t get any new clothes, and they just wore their old ones to tatters.” – From “Christmas Every Day” by William Dean Howells
No, it’s probably a very good thing that every day is NOT Christmas.